One sunny, Saturday morning Bos was walking along the hall trying to decide whether to ask his Daddy to build him a railway track or his sister, to read him a book. As he reached the front door it opened suddenly and there was something standing in the doorway.
'Who are you?' asked Bos, with his head on one side. 'Don't you know?' asked the Thing in the doorway. 'No' said Bos, in a puzzled sort of way. 'Well then' said the Thing 'I'm a Monster'. As it spoke the Thing turned green and purple, a long tail grew from it's back and it's eyes grew big and bulgy. Next big lumps and bumps grew all over it's rough skin and it became completely bald. After it had finished changing everything went quiet for a moment. Then Bos said, quite calmly, 'You can't be a monster.' 'Why not?' asked the Thing. 'Monsters don't wear cardigans' said Bos firmly. 'Oh!' sighed the Thing and before the sigh had finished the tail had gone, the hair was back, the colours disappeared and the lumps and bumps vanished.
'Well' said the Thing 'if I'm not a monster I think I must be a mermaid, I've always wanted to be a mermaid'. As it was speaking the Thing's hair grew long and blonde, almost down to the floor. It's eyes turned blue, it's body became covered in shimmery bluey green scales and, behind it, Bos could quite clearly see big blue waves and seagulls. When it had finished changing the Thing smiled happily but Bos shook his head sadly. 'Sorry' he said 'you can't be a mermaid.' 'Why not?' asked the Thing. 'Mermaids don't wear shoes' said Bos. 'Oh bother!' said the Thing as the hair, the scales, the eyes and the seaside all disappeared instantly.
'Well' said the Thing 'if I'm not a monster and I'm not a mermaid I think I must be a wicked witch and I'm going to turn you into a frog'. Before his very eyes the Thing in the doorway started to change again. It's hair grew long and straggly, it's nose became big and lumpy, a big black pointy hat appeared on it's head and it cackled loudly. 'What do you think of that then?' the Thing asked. Bos thought for a moment and then said, quietly 'You can't be a witch, witches don't smile'. As he finished speaking the hat, the nose and the hair disappeared like magic.
'This is getting very silly' said the Thing. 'If I'm not a monster and I'm not a mermaid and I'm not a witch, what on earth am I?'. Bos looked at it carefully and then said cheerfully 'You're my mummy'. 'Well that's all right then' said the Thing and put down it's bags of shopping. 'Come here and give me a hug.'